Mad At Your Spouse? Log On To Facebook

Facebook has become the new "making a big scene at a restaurant" for many couples around the world. In the olden days when people would get mad at their significant other they would slam the door, give the silent treatment, or throw a glass of water in the other persons face... but like we said, that's waaaaaaaay old school.


The new standard? If you're mad, change your status.


There are definitely some rules, however, to venting on Facebook. The #1 rule is to be as passive aggressive as possible. For example, if you are a husband who is mad at his wife because she didn't cook dinner, you might think to write, "I'm so mad at my wife for not cooking dinner!" Your wife, upon reading this message, may then be inclined to write, "I hate my husband, he does not appreciate me". Anyone who reads this conversation is likely to remove you as a friend. Everything is so uncomfortable now. They don't have the option to comment-- cause what could you say on that status? ("Yeah... your wife is brutal") And they don't have the option to like-- because what could you like about that? Totally ineffective facebook usage.


 The better way for this couple to statusize their feelings would be for husband to say "Boy am I hungry, it'd be cool if someone would make dinner every once in a while." To which his wife could then reply, "Marriage = slavery? Who knew!" Do you see the difference there? You're able to have a passive aggressive, yet public, fight, and your mutual friends can "comment" and "like" without choosing sides and without feeling uncomfortable. Mission accomplished.


On a seperate facebook note, a reader also requested that we here at YogueIN address the proper way to brag on facebook, or rather to let your friends know about your good fortune, without making it look like you're bragging. There is a special way to do that also. Similar rules apply. You'll see many amateur facebook users post things like, "I got an A+!!" or "I won $5,000!!"-- The message is clear, yes, but you haven't left people wanting more. The more experienced and professional approach would be to say "Finally, hard work in school pays off" or "Big things come in small packages!"Now everyone is looking at your page wondering what in the world is going on, and they won't be able to focus on anything but you until they know the answer. Again, mission accomplished.


In short, creating a facebook status is a science. Give it the respect it deserves.


"you like this"




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*For the record, this post does not reflect the views of Gwen Wyntour with regards to facebook.
*She hates it.