Woman Kicked Out Of Walmart For Shopping In A Bikini; World Thinks: "Good Job Walmart"

Conversation Of The Day: Baby Daddy

Co-worker: Yeah so I met this really cool guy he is awesome!

Gwen: Oh yeah? Tell me about him...

Co-worker: Well he's suuuper athletic, and really fun. He's so kind and is just really interested in how I'm feeling and what I'm thinking. You know?

Gwen: Yeah that is really great, he sounds great.

Co-worker: Yeah the only downside, I would say, is that he has 13 children under the age of 3.

Gwen:  . ... .   . .. . .

Royal Wedding: How???

How can we be okay with the fact this (above picture) didn't happen???

Popes Body Exhumed For Beatification; We Are So Dumb

We just read this article on MSNBC.com about Pope John Paul II's body being exhumed in preparation for his "beatification". 

Except because of the crazy glare that is on our computer screen (read also: because we can't read) We thought it said "Pope's body exhumed for beautification". So obviously, we're like "this is so crazy! why isn't the world commenting on how this is crazy!" Plus also we just watched the movie Angels and Demons the other day so.... yeah who know's what we were thinking.

Anyway, regardless of the reason, the late Pope's body was exhumed and you can read about why: here

ps. Oh really?

Man Caught Living With Corpse; Also Caught Living Outside Of His Mind

This man is FOR SURE out of his mind. 

A local Santa Cruz newspaper is reporting that a 63 year old man, John Clauer, has been found living with the body of a 30 year old female corpse. Apparently, the police were called to his apartment to investigate a bad smell. (Most annoying neighbors ever, but also totally legit).

The article goes on to say that Clauer was recently arrested for selling drugs to a 14 year old. Deputy Chief Steve Clark commented that this is "literally the weirdest guy case I've seen". 

Amen.

Read the full article here

14 Year Olds Are Crazy; Boston Proves It

A CBS news affiliate in Boston is reporting that a 14 year old girl has been receiving death threat texts. After receiving 80 such messages, the 14 year old girl (who is also a cancer survivor by the way) went to the police and they discovered that it was a classmate and best friend who was doing the texting!!

So crazy right? Here is an example of one of the texts she got, "I'm going to kill your animals and set off a bomb outside your house".

Needless to say this cyberbully/frenemy is now in counseling. 

Read the full article here

Cell Phone Techonology And Middle Schoolers Ruin Police Officers' Life

Have you guys seen this clip?  Apparently this police man "Officer Davies or Davis" just started pepper spraying this little squirrel. These brutal kids that you hear in the background (we say brutal cause they sound way brutal, turn your volume up) had their cell phones and took a video of the whole thing! Now it's all over YouTube and facebook etc and everyone hates this guy!

Ps. The police department responded saying that the officer thought the squirrel had rabies and he was trying to protect the children. Do you believe that?

Read the full article here

World Hands Out Grossest Text Message Of The Day Award

Dev: My head itches so much it's crazy

Gwen: You gotta cut it

Dev: I just feel like I have monsters living in my hair and they're like planting monster corn and the seeds are itching my scaaalllp

:::: no response, Gwen's phone rings, Devdas calling:::

Gwen: That is so gross. Also, I'm at work, so I can't answer.

Dev: Gwen, this is serious!!! I really feel like I have a disease

Dev: Hey, another thing, can I be a YogueIn intern?

Gwen: Yeah

Huffington Post Writes BorePost About Facebook; Zuckerberg & Co Channel Bella Swan

Complicated Title, but look at this picture, excuse me PITCHER, below!

Big time Bella face! ("just s-s-stop f-f-fighting, lip bite, open mouth to speak lip bite" - Bella)

It's actually unfair for us to call this a boring article, because we literally didn't even click on it. Also, it shows there are 27 comments so like at least 27 people thought it was interesting . . . So, we don't know.

Judge for yourself here

Lawyer Talks To Wyntour; Wyntour Suspects Lazy Eye; Isn't Sure; Wants To Ask; Remembers Home Training

A lawyer recently left our firm, but we are still left wondering, did she or did she not have a lazy eye?? 


It's confusing because there is another girl that we suspect has a lazy eye, which leads us to think maybe we are just seeing things in a crazy way.

But how could we find out?? Is there any polite way to ask someone if they have a lazy eye?

Personality Test

http://www.shapetest.com


click there.

ps. Thanks Bariel Briggs

Facebook AKA Sickbook

An NYC family is suing Facebook for a picture that was posted by one of Facebooks 15 trillion brutal users.

Actually, to be serious, it's a pretty sad story. This young woman was brutally strangled and then the medical examiner who was first at the scene took a picture of her corpse and uploaded it to his Facebook mobile uploads. So sick right?

Obviously he lost his job, but the family is still upset and is saying that Facebook should be held responsible for the crazy things that people do/say/ and upload to the site.

This article names all these laws about why Facebook shouldn't be held responsible for the trauma endured by the family.

What do you think?

Thoughts From Yesterday: Always Wanting To Blog; Not Always Able To

Actually the title to this post is not true, we do not always want to blog. At any rate, we did want to blog yesterday but things were just too busy.

Oh actually, we've just decided that something we hate when people do, is blog about blogging. So we hate this post and we're going to end it right here.

Lion Dies; Real Life Big Cat Diary

Big Cat Diary is one of the best shows on television. If you've not seen it, or if you don't have cable to be able to see it you can just read this article here. Apparently, in a Turkish zoo a Tiger stuck it's paws --------- WAIT...
Okay so we were about to just say blah blah Tiger killed Lion blah blah, but we just went back and read the entire article, and it's like this crazy article about crazy stuff

Read this:

A Turkish zoo says a tiger severed a lion's jugular vein when it stuck its paw through a narrow gap in a door dividing their cages.
The zoo in the Turkish capital of Ankara issued a statement Monday to deny media reports that the tiger bent iron bars to attack the lion and tear it into pieces in the attack on Sept. 4.
It said the tiger had squeezed it's front leg through the door, and in a single stroke left the lion dying in a pool of blood.
It was not clear why the death of one of the three lions in the zoo was publicized so late.
Six tigers remain in an enclosure at the zoo, which insists that it is safe for visitors.

Um yeaaaah.... will you visit this zoo?

xoxo
Gwen!

Breast Milk Being Used For Ice Cream; Has England Lost Its Mind?

This is the second article that we've seen in just as many days where people are cashing in on the "nutritional value" of breast milk. The gist of this article is that a London ice cream shop is using breast milk as the key ingredient in one of their new radically flavored ice creams. The name of this particular menu item is the "Baby Gaga".

In the article, the owner of this specialist parlor said that he "tried the product for the first time today -- it's very nice, it really melts in the mouth."


This is something that we would never eat.

By the way, they are selling it for $23.00 a serving!!

Do Hair Clips Have Age Limits?

You be the judge!

Vocabulary Lesson: "Mini T's"

Mini T (noun): Any t-shirt that for some reason looks like it is really small on you. It's important to note that this has nothing to do with the person being over weight but rather the length ratio of shirt to pants (or shirt to skirt, shirt to shorts etc).

Example:

Our friend Bwapp wears Mini T's all the time. We don't think, however, that they are exclusive to Utah. So if you ever notice that people are looking at you with a look that says, "weird...that's a really small shirt", then you are probably wearing a Mini T. You can email Yoguein@gmail.com for help.

Worst Proposal Ever...Maybe (Take 2)

After talking with our blog, we decided to try to tell you about the bad proposal again. The problem is, is that it really is a boring story. So we'll just net it out, and tell you what happened:

1. A guy wanted to propose to his girlfriend

2. He tied the ring to a sand dollar

3. She picked up the sand dollar and the ring went tumbling out into the ocean

4. The ring is gone

5. The two of them are trying to play it off like they aren't mad but are really glad to have a story to tell their children.

Read the full story here

Do You Fight With Your Roommates?

So when we still lived in Maryland, we were on this email list for the D.C. area, where people would email out and say things like, "Hey I have an apartment available" or "Hey I'm selling this furniture", or "Hey party at my place tonight"...this one girl said "Hey I'm selling my old clothes size woman sizes 28-32 $5 per item of clothing" We know right? So yeah stuff like that.

Anyway, since we've moved, we still receive these emails. Today we got one looking for a new roommate. The full email is below:

We highlighted our favorite parts in yellow.

So whenever you have roommate problems just think; "What Would Micheal Do Email Out To Washington D.C.?" WWMEOTWDC. It will give you strength.

oh, really?

ps. Can you even read that? You'll have to zoom. It's the only way.

Love & Friendship (WARNING: EMO POST BELOW!)

"True love must include the idea of permanence"

We love our siblings

and our parents so much too.

Can't wait to be home.

---------------------------

Haikus For Gwen

Judge, Judge, Judge, Judge, Judge

My life is better than yours

And you should know it.

----------------------------

Tell me a secret.

I will not keep it for you,

It's my new weapon

----------------------------

And what about this?

Does it hurt when I do that?

That's good. I am glad.

----------------------------

I never liked you.

Love? Ha! Out of the question

Bet you couldn't tell.